SARAH SPEAKS: IT'S A CHOICE NOT BY FORCE

by - 6:52:00 pm

The older I get, the more I believe that we're as good as the company we keep. Having been brought up with a great support system, my family, made me realise the importance of healthy association. 

I'm one of those quiet talkative sorts though most people think I'm shy but really in most situations I like to observe and study people around before deciding who I interact with. Now this has been of both my benefit and detriment in life. A benefit in the sense that I have a great support system, trustworthy and reliable people around me. A detriment because often times I'm seen as either uptight, proud or shy, which is quite sad.

But I believe in this life, we are actually not supposed to connect with everyone we meet and that's okay, perfectly fine and good even. And I don't think we should have to force friendships or relationships either. "Friendship is a choice, it really isn't by force"as Dr Paul Enenche said and further reiterated the need "to love liberally but relate carefully"

Growing up as children everyone was our friend just by simply running around together. But the older I've gotten the more I realise when it comes to friendship its not about the quantity but the quality. Because it really isn't about how many people you have around you but how much impact those people have in your life.

And when I talk about impact, I mean good impact. People who push you to do better, be better. People who pull you up rather than push you down. Now you might not talk always especially with Long distance friendships or relationships but when you need them, you know they've got your back.

My thoughts, nothing good comes easy, so we've got to take our time to form healthy connections

What are your thoughts on this? Should friendships be forced in any case?  Can you relate with this? How do you deal with this?

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8 comments

  1. Oh yeah, I agree. Friendship can't be forced, and it has to be a two-way thing.

    I too can be quite shy, and a lot of times it's been mistaken for being snobby.

    Berry Dakara Blog

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    1. Its sad our society, when they don't understand you, they put you in a box.

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  2. I agree so much with this! thanks for sharing :)


    lifeofacameo.blogspot.co.uk

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  3. A bird at hand is worth two in the bush. I am also very selective of who i hang with and will rather have one quality friend than a thousand not so great individuals.
    Beutfull

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    1. Yes girl with the African proverbs. Glad you get my point, one good friend can change your life as is better than a hundred fake one.

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  4. I feel you Sarah, I particularly relate with you on the part you mentioned about being seen as uptight, proud just because I observe before interacting or letting people into my life. But as the days go by my mum always say you can't please everyone and displease yourself, because at the end of the day you have to do what is best and healthy for you, you. The bible also says in proverbs 13:20 whoever walks with wise men shall become wise but the company of fools will suffer harm. Plus in my uni days I also learnt you can't force anything but to go with the flow and also walk away from people and situations that doesn't seem right. Really love this article it's like you read mind.
    Finally, Quality is more valuable than quantity, that's what I live by. I see a lot of people with a great number of friends but there's no impact in each other their lives and when they need each other no one is there. What's the essence of that type of friendship? I'm not saying shun those that aren't close to you but I believe you can be cordial with people without being close to them if that makes sense.


    Bernie, xx
    The Style Fanatic

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    1. Girl this is part two of the post lol. I love how you threw in the proverbs scripture. And as you said we are not shunning people but working to choose the best people that will grow us. And yeah you can't please everyone, I learnt that a long time ago.

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